Ozakmrzmn
Seventeen
A Republican
Mysteriously Magical
-----------
Friday, July 18, 2008
where were you when i need you most?
im just so sad right now. you see i got my motivational workshop since wed till today-was my last day. it was freaking awesome. but somehow i just feel so lonely, today my friends treated like imma piece of crap. leave me behind all alone, when i talk to then they pretended i wasnt there, & ya they never look at me. wtf? what have i done wrong. do i fucking look like i owe ur father money?! stupid stuck ups bitches. so & blabla i when to text boyf confessing how i they're behaving. i end up getting nothing & feeling sorry for myself. seriously i have a confession to make, firstly i got my close friends who treat me like dirt today for no fucking asshole reasons, secondly i am so tired- for goodness sake i have to wake up at 5am rush to sch & reach home at 10pm. the workshop lasted for more than 12hrs, its even worse than you guys who's WORKING. im even more tired than u guys. thirdly, pls lah talk when otp. yknow i had a hard time at sch just now & ur adding on to it. forthly, he doesnt even give a eff abt how i feel. fifthly, i was looking forward to meet you tmr-saturday, but last minute you cancel & tell me ur working all the way till 11. i even record down in my handbook. wahh thanks alot dude. sixthly, when i say i wana meet you on sunday. you say "no, confirm i go home late one". pardon for my horrible english.
i learnt that, seriously in life you got no one but yourself. if your love ones bring you down, who else you wanna look up to. mom?dad?sister?friends?even boyfriend? hell no. it's you yourself whose gonna make you feel better. frankly i dont really have anyone beside me, i dont have anybody's shoulder to cry on but myself. for now, i dont even know i have anyone who really cares about me deeply & with sincerity.
p.s where were you when i need you most?
where were you when im having my breakdowns in my life. where were you to bring me up again when i fall? i love myself more than i do for anyone. cos everyone out there, you're just nothing but just a bunch of pretenders. trying to look like you care but you dont. fuck you
">
